


Been there, done that

by Beleriandings



Category: Torchwood
Genre: F/M, Friendship, Gen, Humour, Ianto survives (how is not important), Implied Sexual Content, Lois comes to work at Torchwood 3, Lois learns what constitutes professionalism at Torchwood 3, M/M, Series 03 Fix-It: Children of Earth (Torchwood)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-21
Updated: 2020-10-21
Packaged: 2021-03-09 02:33:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 699
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27136669
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Beleriandings/pseuds/Beleriandings
Summary: As Gwen and Ianto show her around the crater where the Hub used to be, Lois has one or two important questions.
Relationships: Gwen Cooper/Rhys Williams, Jack Harkness/Ianto Jones, Lois Habiba & Gwen Cooper & Ianto Jones
Comments: 12
Kudos: 62





	Been there, done that

"And that's about all for the tour I'm afraid" said Gwen, as she and Ianto stood on either side of Lois by the iron railing. "Sorry there isn't more to show you..."

"...But our base got rather blown up by order of your former boss" finished Ianto.

"What he said" said Gwen. "Any questions?"

"Um" said Lois, frowning and leaning over to look down into the giant tarpaulin-covered crater. "If the entire Hub and all your tech-"

" _Our_ tech" Gwen put in kindly, "since you're one of us now."

"Since all our tech was destroyed, why did you have those contact lenses?"

Gwen and Ianto exchanged what could only be described as a _Look_. Lois glanced from one to the other, certain she'd missed some piece of vital briefing material, as Gwen's ears turned slightly pink.

"Um..." said Gwen. "See, the thing about that is..."

"Gwen had requisitioned them for personal use at the time" said Ianto.

"We can do that, with Torchwood tech?" said Lois in surprise. "I could have sworn Captain Harkness said nothing leaves the archives without his say-so."

Ianto made a sound that was far too polite to be called a snort. "He does say that sometimes, yes."

"But, ah," said Gwen, "the rules are really a little more relaxed than Jack probably made them sound."

"How do you mean?"

"Gwen brought the lenses home for... extracurricular reasons" said Ianto, with utmost gravity. "Apparently Rhys was also all for it."

She raised her eyebrow, still confused.

"...You know how some people have mirrors on their bedroom ceilings" said Ianto.

" _Oh_ " said Lois, feeling herself flush too as she looked from one of them to the other. "...um. Gosh" she said, unable to think of anything else.

"Indeed."

Gwen reached across and smacked Ianto lightly on the arm. "Oi! You can get off your high horse for a start. It was you that gave me the idea, and don't think you get a special pass because you're shagging the boss." She looked over at Lois. "On a related note, trust me when I say you should probably learn to knock before walking into rooms around here, for your own sanity."

"I nearly died, and this is how I'm treated" sighed Ianto a little plaintively, over Lois's other shoulder.

Gwen continued, unfazed. "And anyway, me having the lenses to hand brought down the corrupt government, saved the children of this world including your very own niece and nephew, Ianto, and also brought us Lois too. I don't see how you pilfering those telepathically-controlled infrasonic orbs for personal use last month did anything close. And yes I do know about that, thank you very much."

_You're a long way from the Home Office now_ , thought Lois to herself as she watched this exchange with cautious fascination.

" _That_ " Ianto was saying, with an impressive amount of dignity under the circumstances, Lois thought, "was all Jack's idea. I had nothing to do with it."

"Uh, it was your access code that was used to get them from the archives?"

"By proxy, then. ...He may have been a little tied up at the time."

Gwen simply rolled her eyes, but she was grinning. "Well, there we go then. ...Plus, Rhys and I both got to have some fun in advance of a very hard week."

"...It _is_ fun" agreed Ianto. "That's well-established by now."

"Oh, absolutely" said Gwen, and they both solemnly nodded in agreement. "Anyway" she said, clapping her hands briskly and jolting Lois out of her quiet reverie after a moment. "I hope that answered your question?"

"Uh" said Lois. "Yes, thank you. Very... comprehensive."

"Good" said Gwen, with an encouraging smile. Her eyes caught on something behind Lois and Ianto. "Oh, there's Jack! Shall we?" she extended her arm for Lois to slip hers through.

As she took it, Ianto took her other arm and the three of them began to walk across the Plass together, towards Jack who was giving them a big grin and a wave as he walked towards them.

_Yes, definitely a long way from the Home Office_ , Lois decided. But she thought on balance, she could definitely stand to learn a little more.

**Author's Note:**

> This was just a little tumblr post fic I wrote in my phone notes because I'm just sat here thinking about Gwen and Ianto's conversation about the contact lenses 24/7 ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ 
> 
> ~~Gwen and Rhys being very specifically horny at the right moment indirectly saved 10% of all the children on the planet, pass it on~~


End file.
